Alone During Grief

Updated: Jun 28


Grief is a type of trauma. It occurs when something in life has created a sense of loss because it has changed. Regardless of what type of loss it is, grief is similar but can be different in intensity. The more intense the loss, the more intense the trauma. When there is an enormous change in life, trauma can be extensive. In the case of the loss of a loved one, nothing will ever be the same. When trauma from a deep loss occurs, life-altering things begin to process from within. We have to learn to adjust to living a life without a loved one we will always miss. Learning to live life without someone in the space of love we have held for them is not easy. The adjustment takes time. Much of the time taken might be alone without the noise and interference from the rest of the world. This is not unusual, it is necessary. Being brave enough to face grief alone makes us stronger, not weaker.


Not everyone will understand our need for aloneness. It's our process, not anyone else's. It's alright. All we can do is hope they never have to experience our grief. Yet, if they ever do, they will see how you paved the way toward becoming whole again in the face of deep change.


Remember, the caterpillar weaves a cocoon around itself because change must happen. The caterpillar instinctively knows this truth and reality. So it weaves a hardened space for it to be alone for its deep transformation. For the caterpillar, life will never be the same. If the cocoon is broken by interference, the process is interrupted and the butterfly meant to be formed will forever be lame and not able to live life afterward.


Don't interrupt your own grieving process. Don't allow anyone else to interrupt it or you might never be strong enough to fly afterward. Be like the caterpillar. Weave your necessary cocoon, let the transformation begin, and learn to fly after the process is over. You will fly. Your life will never be the same as it was before, but you will live. If you understand the process and instinctively obey what nature designed for you to do, then you will be alright. Just keep on doing the inner work needed to be strong enough to survive.


Loving you from here,

Jenine Marie

** Photo credit: Supplied by wix.com photos through unsplash



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